Mom vs. Mom: Work or Stay Home Essay

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This research paper started with the purpose of demoing that female parents who stay home with their kids as opposed to working exterior of the place was better for kid development. The consequences were surprising. The research began by researching the attitudes of female parents toward each other. A figure of stay-at-home female parents feel that working mas are pretermiting their kids in order to “have it all. instead than do material forfeits. ” ( Lowery ) Various working category female parents indicate that stay-at-home mas are “soap opera watching couch murphies with no aspiration. ” ( Walker ) . These outlooks have resulted in the social war of Mom V. Mom. opposing the working ma against the stay-at-home ma in a struggle over which theoretical account offers what is best for the kids. Many of these attitudes are due to deficiency of instruction about the true effects of day care for kids. Other jobs arise because employers and authorities policies are disregarding working families’ demands.

In world. stay-at-home female parents wear many chapeaus. They are the household CEO. the twenty-four hours attention supplier. comptroller. chauffeur. counsellor. chef. nurse. washwoman. entertainer. personal stylist. and teacher. Salary. com studies that “based on a 90-hour workweek. a just pay for the typical stay-at-home ma would be $ 88. 276 for put to deathing all of her day-to-day undertakings. Factor in overtime. and the appropriate salary springs to $ 112. 797. ” ( Robo ) On the other manus. working female parents are drawing dual responsibility by equilibrating work and household. and many are making so with a divided bosom. They are non seeking to hold it all. but whether working by pick or necessity. they do hold to make it all. Both types of female parents deserve recognition where recognition is due. yet the inquiry remains. “What is best for the kids? ”

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There was a clip when the primary function of adult females was to keep the household and back up their hubbies in supplying for the household. During wartime. demands shifted and adult females were forced into the workplace because their hubbies were off. Until the seventiess. many surveies were biased toward the “negative impact of an unemployed male on his household or on the negative impact of the employed female on her household. ” ( Ambrosino 484 ) Those surveies influenced the Black Marias of parents in our state for decennaries. Stay-at-home mas experience surveies that are more recent are biased toward relieving the guilt many female parents feel from working exterior of the place. That influence is still apparent today as shown in the undermentioned study done by Employment. com. Given the pick. more than half of all female parents would prefer to remain place with their kids. at least portion clip. Merely nine per centum would take to hold a full clip calling.

This graph may besides reflect that parents feel day care can non supply the raising a loving parent can. but do day cares truly harm our kids?

To counter that enquiry. it is indispensable to look at the effects of child care outside the place in relationship to the attention a kid receives from a stay-at-home parent. The National Institute of Child Health and Human Development ( NICHD ) released its most current survey in April of 2001. They preformed a child care survey by “following more than 1. 300 kids at 10 different sites across the state from birth into the school-age old ages. The
survey looked at the interaction between kid features. the place environment and child-care scenes to assist explicate how the kids developed over clip. ” ( Todd )

Their survey confirmed that the hours spent in assorted types of attention affected kid development. More attention by relations was neither easing nor unfavourable to child development. More clip in “home-based. non-relative attention ( defined as a non-relative health professional who cared for the kid in the survey and at least one other kid ) was associated with better linguistic communication outcomes during the yearling years” ( Todd ) but lower linguistic communication results during the preschool old ages. There was no grounds that hours in center-based attention during babyhood had peculiarly negative effects on later development. at least through the early school old ages.

Furthermore. by preschool old ages. kids with “more hours in centre attention displayed more advanced linguistic communication and cognitive accomplishments although health professionals besides reported more behavior jobs among kids who had more hours in center-based attention. ” ( Todd ) This could be linked to the find that center-based health professionals had higher degrees of preparation and instruction. provided more linguistic communication stimulation and more structured activities than home-based suppliers gave. The slightly higher degree of behavior jobs in centre scenes suggests that it is of import for attention suppliers to provide experiences that promote societal and emotional growing along with supplying a cognitively enriching environment. ( Todd )

The survey besides showed that the figure of hours in attention besides mattered.

“At age 4-1/2. 16 % of the kids who were in attention 30 hours or more per hebdomad showed higher degrees of job behaviours ( such as contending ) than kids in fewer hours of attention. This consequence was besides apparent in kindergarten where 17 % of the kids showed higher degrees of these behaviours. It is of import to observe. nevertheless. that another survey showed 16-17 % of all kids typically exhibit higher degrees of these job behaviours. ” ( Todd )

Therefore. the incidence of behaviour jobs for kids in full-time attention was no higher than that found in the general population of kids. On the other terminal of the graduated table. kids in attention less than 10 hours per hebdomad showed really low degrees of job behaviours. Merely six per centum of these kids demonstrated higher degrees of these debatable behaviours at 4-1/2 old ages. although this increased to nine per centum in kindergarten. ( Todd )

Earlier research has shown that kids in child care may besides see normal events sooner than kids cared for at place because of the nature of the child-care scene. For illustration. kids in day care tend to hold more respiratory piece of land infections ( besides colds. ear infections. sore pharynxs. grippe. etc. ) as kindergartners where kids who stay at place tend to hold more of these unwellnesss in ulterior life. This may go on Oklahoman for kids in day care than for kids cared for at home… [ because they are exposed to other kids sooner. ] ( Todd )

Finally. the quality of child care. parenting. and the place environment was besides related to children’s behaviours in the NICHD survey. Children whose female parents were more sensitive and antiphonal to their demands displayed better pre-academic and linguistic communication accomplishments and had fewer behavior jobs. It is besides of import to observe that in this research. it was discovered that the most of import influential factor on kids. whether reared entirely by a stay-at-home parent or in some signifier of child care. was the parents’ attitude. Mothers who are working when they want to be home negatively affect their kids. as do female parents who want to be working when they want to be place. ( Todd )

While researching possible replies to the inquiry ‘what is best for our children’ three things became clear after looking at the research done by NICHD: the sum of clip kids spent in attention mattered. the attitude of the parents mattered. and the quality of day care and place life environment mattered. The quandary is. merely 28 % of twenty-four hours attention centres can be considered quality child care. ( Friedman ) Quality twenty-four hours cares cost more money than lower quality twenty-four hours attentions. ( Knitzer ) Some parents rely on household members to assist care for their kids while they work for fiscal grounds and because it is thought that household members have more emotionally invested with their kids. While household members and/or friends can be helpful in supplying quality attention. friends and relations can be burdened by the excess duties. which merely add to a mother’s feelings of guilt. It would be good if there were more on-site. low-cost. quality twenty-four hours attentions provided by the employers.

There are besides surveies that show kids less than 9 months of age should be with their parents. ( Phillips ) Coupled with horror narratives of day cares across the state like the 1s found in Brian C. Robertson’s book in Day Care Deception: What the Child Care Establishment Isn’t Telling Us it is no admiration parents are confused and torn between the demand to remain place with their kid or return to work. ( Lowery )

Many female parents work outside of the place for a assortment of grounds and have many different feelings about it. Some female parents want the self-realization of holding a calling. while other female parents are economically forced to work. During an interview with individual working female parent “Margie” . she revealed that working made her a better female parent to her boy. “Working makes me happy. If I’m non happy. that’s traveling to slop over into our day-to-day lives. Staying place twenty-four hours in and twenty-four hours out would non be good for my boy or me. Besides I’m learning him approximately good work ethic. pride. and enthusiasm. and still pull off to make a batch of the things stay-at-home mas do. ” While the economic system plays a big factor in Margie’s determination to work. she revealed that she is content in working because she knows her kid is in a great day care centre and she has really flexible hours… but she’s lucky. ( Margie )

While questioning “Jennifer” . a married working female parent of two. it became clear that non all female parents are content working exterior of the place. “I’ve had some atrocious experiences with twenty-four hours attention. It’s really hard for me to take off work when my kids are ill. My cyberspace expendable income of approximately $ 1100. 00 a month is whittled off by child care. auto care. and other work related disbursals. ” Jennifer explains that wellness insurance for herself and her household. along with the demand for a retirement fund is the driving force behind her working about 50 hours a hebdomad outside the place.

Jennifer expressed that would love to cut her hours back to the minimal 30 hours per hebdomad needed to retain her benefits. She stated that her employers are non willing to let employees to cut down hours that much. ( Jennifer ) In order to make ‘what is best for the children’ we have to happen a balance between maintaining the parents and the kids happy while run intoing the demands of all parties involved. Work related disbursals that keep mas who would wish to work from working are no happier than mas who want to be place but can non afford to be.

One of the nucleus beliefs of group ‘Mothers and More’ is that “a female parent is more than any individual function she plays at any given point in her life-time. She is entitled to to the full research and develop her individuality as she chooses: as a adult female. a parent. or an employee. ” ( Mothers and More ) Their end is to “reorganize and redefine work such that the work of caring for others is seen and treated as equal in value to paid work. ” ( Mothers and More ) Many of today’s work policies and plans are still based on “family and work demographics as they existed in the 1950s” despite the fact that fewer than 10 % of households in America can be classified that manner. ( Ambrosino 486 ) One of the ways Moms and More are seeking to accomplish their end is to “support statute law …that ensures relative wage. benefits and promotion for portion clip and contingent workers. ” ( Mothers and more )

The organisation would besides wish to raise consciousness “about how current revenue enhancement policies affect household determinations and constrains the options available to parents for uniting paid work and attention giving over their life-times. ” ( Mothers and More ) An issue that is a peculiar concern for mas who want to remain place is the impact of their absence from the work force when they are ready to travel back. With more attempts to include all types of female parents by employers and authorities policies. many issues of guilt and the demand for flexibleness could be addressed.

“Guilt among adult females is bacteria gone wild. 1 that eats off their pleasances and ruins their lives. ” ( Halcomb ) Because of social confusion about women’s altering functions. the media tends to over study negative findings about twenty-four hours attention and under study or misreport positive findings. “It is of import for female parents to experience that their work and day care usage is positive since outstanding research shows that guilt and dying feelings. non daycare. ” ( Phillips ) are what is damaging to children’s development. In somw instances. parents confuse feelings of guilt with feeling of losing their kid. ( Callahan ) It is besides of import to educate parents that some separation anxiousness on both the parent’s portion and the child’s portion is normal and non detrimental.

One turning tendency that addresses the deficiency of flexibleness in the workplace is a newer class known as “Work at Home Moms. ” Many female parents are happening that working from place can run into many of the demands they are confronting. If working from place in concurrence with the employer is non an option. get downing a place based concern might be an option. Yet “the fright of no benefits maintain many a ma from working at place. ” ( Folger ) Salvaging for the hereafter is difficult for many households and it is even harder when a individual is freelance. Nevertheless. with some self-cultivation about traditional. Roth. and rollover IRA’s. work at place parents can hold the same retirement benefits as any other freelance worker. If wellness insurance can non be obtained through the spouses’ employment. it can frequently be purchased through a private company. although frequently at a higher monetary value.

Another option might be extended paid pregnancy leave. There was a clip when pregnancy leave was put in topographic point in order to “protect the mother’s physical wellness. ” ( Kamerman ) Now other concerns. such as the wellbeing of the kid and paternal engagement. are being addressed in states such as Europe by implementing 14 hebdomads of paid leave for both parents. ( Kamerman ) Other states offer up to a twelvemonth in partly paid leave such as New Zealand. ( Friedman ) The Institute for Child and Family Policy provinces. “The United States is entirely among the advanced industrialised states in the briefness of its statutory leave and among the really few states with its unpaid leave. ” ( Kamerman ) Many parents can non even afford to take the paternity and pregnancy foliages offered to them because they need the money. It is our ain state that bring oning guilt and adversity on our households by non turn toing the issues of today’s society.

There are many sentiments about whether female parents should work or remain place with their kids. There are as many surveies to back up whatever side a individual stands on. all of which are in struggle. The fact is American employers and authorities should analyze other countries’ program to manage these types of issues… and so use the thoughts. Ann Crinntendon. writer of The Price of Motherhood. points out that in Sweden. adult females are given a year’s pregnancy leave with 85 % of their wage “up to a certain ceiling” . In add-on. when they go back to work. they have the right to a six-hour working day “with the jurisprudence on their side. ” ( Crinnntendon ) Businesses in America are one of the last holdouts for paid leave. While America may be one of the richest states in this universe. the most of import occupation to America is still the least valued: parenting.

Plants Cited

Ambrosino. R. . Heffernan. J. . Shuttlesworth. G. . and Ambransino. R. . ( 2001 ) . Social Work and Social Welfare. ( 4th erectile dysfunction. . rev. ) Belmont. Brooks/Cole. Wadsworth.

Callahan. Patrick. ( 1999 ) . Researcher Finds No Developmental Differences in Children With Working Moms Versus Non-Working Moms. News Release. March 1. 1999. Home page. Retrieved November 25. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //www. Uma. edu/newsoffice/archive/1999/030199moms. hypertext markup language

Clark. Cindy. ( 2002 ) . Work at Home Moms. Moms work at place twenty-four hours attention. Retrieved November 28. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //www. amomslove. com/moms-wahm-daycare. hypertext markup language

Crittendon. Anne. ( 2003 ) . The Price of Motherhood: An Interview With Anne Crittendon. Family Education Network. Retrieved November 25. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //familyeducation. com/article/0. 1120. 62-21810-0-4. 00. hypertext markup language

Folger. Liz. ( 2001 ) . What Do You Mean There Aren’t Any Benefits? The Busy Work at Home Mom. Retrieved on November 21. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //www. childfun. com/articles/bizy/101799. shtml

Kamerman. Shelia. ( 2002 ) . Institute for Child and Family Policy. Parental leave policies: An indispensable ingredient in early childhood instruction and attention policies. Social Policy Report. Vol. 14. No. 2. . 2000. Retrieved
November 21. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //www. childpolicy. org/menu. htm

Lowery. Rich. ( 2003 ) . Bring back the stay at place ma. Home page. Retrieved November 26. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //www. townhall. com/columnists/richlowry/rl20030808. shtml

Mothers and More. ( 2003 ) . Mission Statement. Retrieved December 1. 2003. from World Wide Web. MothersandMore. org

Phillips. Deborah. & A ; Adams. Gina ( 2002 ) . Child Care and Our Youngest Children. The Future of Children. Volume 11. Number 1 – Spring/Summer 2001 Friedman. Dana. ( 2002 ) . Employer Supports for Parents with Young Children Knitzer ; Jane. ( 2002 ) . Federal and State Attempts to Improve Care for Infants and Toddlers Retrieved November 21. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //www. futureofchildren. org/pubs-info2825/pubs-info. htm? doc_id=79324

Sutton. Kyanna. ( 2003 ) . Do Working Moms Make Better Moms? Retrieved November 25. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //www. familyeducation. com/article/0. 1120. 62-287. 00. hypertext markup language

Todd. Christine. ( 2001 ) NICHD Child Care Study Results: What do they intend for parents. child-care professionals. employers and determination shapers? Child and Family Development University of Georgia. Retrieved November 28. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //www. nncc. org/Research/NICHD. ECIresponse. hypertext markup language

Walker. Julia. ( 2002 ) How Much are Stay at Home Moms Worth. Home page. Retrieved November 14. 2003. from hypertext transfer protocol: //www. employmentspot. com/features/mom. htm

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