The term ambivalency refers to the construct of uncertainness or fluctuation. particularly when caused by inability to do a pick or by the coincident desire to state or make two opposite or conflicting things. This province of ambivalency manifests itself throughout people’s mundane lives. The picks and determinations one makes. whether it be little or big. causes a sense of uncertainness within him/her. Through this uncertainness. a feeling of tenseness signifiers with one’s sense of ego. The tenseness is derived from the at hand pick one must reason with.
Peoples may anticipate to do an ideal pick when one doesn’t really exist. …the job with doing a pick for one option is that you have to give up every other possibility — that is. you have to restrict yourself to the one thing you’ve chosen and renounce all the others. ( Burgo ) There seems to be two things at the root of ambivalence—the pick and the fright of the pick. The quotation mark stated above by Dr. Joseph Burgo elucidates that the challenge of ambivalency is a affair of pick ( people don’t want to really hold to take ) .
Worlds. by nature. are selfish existences who crave and desire all the values they are able to achieve. In the event that one must take between two ve’ry appealing options. that individual is deluging with ambivalency. The individual is so lacerate because he/she desires both options but sees that it is impossible to make so. Both picks are appealing but a determination must be made. Within the facet of pick. there is ever the instance of fright within one doing the determination. We may be afraid of loss or repent if we choose “badly” . and/or we may fear the savageness of our ain scruples if we make a “mistake” .
( Burgo ) A individual becomes afraid of doing a pick. particularly if doing a determination can negatively impact them. He/she besides becomes fearful of losing the other option when taking the other due to the fact that in most instances. one time a determination is made it is finally—there is no traveling back. There is besides the facet that one’s picks can impact another individual or the sentiment of that individual doing the pick. If one picks something. he/she may really good lose person who does non hold with that pick. Ambivalence reflects an intense fright of the effects involved in taking.
One illustration that can show these facets of ambivalency is pregnancy—trying to take between life and abortion. On one terminal. a adult female has the option of maintaining the babe. raising it. caring for and loving it. watching it grow old while destroying her repute or have a life reminder of the male parent ( if the male parent is non in the image or is a raper ) . At the other terminal. she can kill the unborn foetus and kill any opportunity of that foetus holding a life. but the adult female can retain her life non hold to take on the duty of caring for a kid.
The two picks she has both contain “pros” and “cons. ” The adult female might go afraid of the pick she must do because if she chooses life. she will hold to hold the duty of taking attention of a life being and people will judge her ; she besides might fear she does non possess the resources to assist keep the life of the babe ( money for nutrient. nappies. bottles. etc. ) . If the adult female were to take abortion. she might be fearful because she will being killing something human. something that is a portion of her. something that is alive.
She could be consumed in guilt because she might see herself selfish and a liquidator. The adult female would besides go afraid that she might lose some people who are of import to her because of the people’s sentiments ; she will lose people either manner. The adult female has become ambivalent on this topic and does non desire to take ; non because she wants both. but because she doesn’t want the effect of the picks she makes. Meyer 3 Another illustration that could clarify this impression of ambivalency is the common topic of love.
Often times. adult females and work forces become ambivalent when the event of loving two people arises. For case. a adult female desires two work forces that are both appealing to her. It can be seen here that the adult female does non wish to truly take between them. she wants them both. However. she realizes that this desire to possess both is unachievable. Further analysing this state of affairs. one could reason that the adult female can non truly love the first adult male because if she did. why did she fall for the 2nd?
Taking this construct into head. one might state that the ambivalency does non lie with the adult female non being able to take between the work forces but with the adult female non being able to take what she likes most in the men’s features. Bringing in the fright of losing one of the work forces she loves. her ambivalency has escalated. Besides. the fact of the affair is. the adult female ever want perfect relationships “She couldn’t tolerate an reliable ( and hence imperfect ) relationship with an existent adult male but wanted a perfect bond without defeat. struggle or disappointment” ( Burgo ) .
Ambivalence is a consequence of Human’s desire for a overplus of things. The pick one must do when faced with two options creates in them a province of tenseness. Peoples do non desire to hold to choose— they want all the picks or none of the pick. However. they realize that a pick must be made. When capable to a pick that might negatively impact he/she. a sense of fright is evident. The individual becomes afraid of losing the option one time doing his or her determination as most determinations are lasting. Besides. one might go fearful of losing person who does non O.K. of the pick the individual has made.
